Get Ready to Figure Out WHO You Are

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. Cal Jung.

The goal of Module 1 is to discover the truth about why you’re behaving the way you are with your finances and walk away with a foundation to build on.

Financial self-awareness is all about dealing with the unconscious. Let’s face it, for many of us when it comes to money - that’s most of it.

We’re not taught to talk about money in the same way we talk about books, movies, family, holidays or our love life. It’s uncomfortable and for some of us it makes us feel exposed and vulnerable, so we avoid talking about money entirely.

The problem is, this avoidance is financially derailing many of us. Or at the very least, stopping us from reaching our full financial potential.

Too often when it comes to money, food, fitness, relationships or anything where emotion is involved, we dive straight into the seven-step plan and ignore why we behave that way in the first place. Sheer willpower can cause us to keep it up for a while, but eventually we get bored, tired, or life happens and we start to lose momentum. Next thing we know we’ve signed up for another challenge, or ten step plan, or detox because we’re right back where we started.

We’re not going to make that mistake here.

The first two modules might seem fluffy and a little woo woo-ish. BUT they're vital to ensure you’re creating a great base for yourself. We'll refer to these two weeks again and again as we move through the 8 weeks as you understand what type of financial plan, strategy, investments & habits will work best for you and you’re devising something unique to you and your particular way of viewing the world.

Financial Awareness: Why Start Here?

Lesson 1

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Financial Adulting Quiz

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What is abundantly clear to me, after more than a decade of dealing with women and their finances, is many of us feel awkward and uncomfortable about money. This often leads to women not having a great relationship with money. I mean, it’s difficult to have a relationship with someone or something that you’re not willing to talk or think about.

For all the blokes here, your relationship with money often isn't much better. It's often twisted around what you believe masculinity should look like and the role you should play.

Which is why for many of us, our so-called relationship with money has turned toxic. Let’s be honest, if money was a bad boyfriend (or girlfriend) we would quickly kick it to the curb!

The problem is, unlike an inconsiderate partner, money is something we’re stuck with. But unlike a normal relationship, we can dictate terms. That’s why, instead of working on our relationship with money, I believe many of us need to start by taking a break from it.

I'm talking an ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ type trial separation.

Now, I appreciate this is easier said than done. After all, if we compare money to another of our daily requirements, food, we can see another, often toxic, relationship.

We reward ourselves with food when we’re good. We deny ourselves when we’re bad. We’re constantly trying to break up with it. Yet, if we’re honest, we behave like little children let loose in the snack cupboard most of the time. Little wonder we don’t have a great relationship with food.

Yet there is a movement to reign it in. To break up with the food we’ve been eating. To forge a new relationship with real food that’s good for us. I believe it’s time we applied this same thinking to our finances.

To stop how we’re currently behaving and begin a new relationship with money. One we’re not ashamed of. Which leads me to the first Challenge... the 30 Day Financial Detox.

Breaking Up with Money

Lesson 2

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30 Day Detox Can and Can’ts

Challenge: 30 Day Financial Detox

How does the detox work? Choose a period of time – my recommendation is that it’s a minimum of 14 days but preferably 30 days and the idea is that you don’t buy anything new for those 14 or 30 days.

Now if you immediately vomited a little in your mouth at the idea of not spending, can I suggest that you absolutely need to do this. For others, think of it as fine-tuning.

I’ve included a template in your downloads where you choose what you're going to detox from. Personally, my detox is shoes, clothes, magazines and books because they're the things I tend to consume more. For my husband Tony it's his second and subsequent coffees and eating lunch out because they're unconscious choices he's making. Yes, he can still have his daily coffee but not three plus a croissant, plus lunch, plus plus plus. Get the idea?

You can spend on your needs during the detox (again, consciously choosing via the download what you are choosing to spend money on) but you're also going to choose what you cannot spend money on. The the trick is, during that time to take note of the emotion behind those times when you go to spend. Plus the added benefit is that you'll be more mindful of your spending so you'll be more conscious of your finances which is all a positive as you dive into this course.

Consider the 30 day detox as a way to amplify this course. Will you still get value without doing it? Of course you will. But if you do add the detox, will you learn things about yourself you didn’t realise and will you magnify the results? Absofreakinglutely.

Wealth Creation Values

Financial Relationship

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When you break up with someone, experts often suggest that you figure out what worked for you in the relationship, what didn’t work for you and what you might be looking for in your next relationship.
That’s what we’re going to do here.

We’re going to assess your relationship with money and figure out what you want it to be moving forward.

For some of you, your current relationship with money might be helpful, loving and beneficial. For others it will be awkward, toxic and uncomfortable. This is not about judgement. Instead, it’s about awareness so you can start to make the unconscious conscious and realise what is serving you and what you need to let go of.

If you struggle with completing the exercises in these first modules for money - maybe answer them as if you were thinking about exercise or relationships or food and then try it for money. See if there are any parallels there.

Now, when you do these exercises, you might be surprised by what this digs up.

I've had clients who have realised they've inherited super unhelpful money messages from their parents that are messing with how they behave financially. I’ve had other clients realise that how they behave with money mimics how they behave with a parent and they’ve created a parent/child relationship with money that they’ve been rebelling against. You might realise you've taken on society's expectations of your finances (get married, buy a house, have kids) which is potentially not what you want so you're sabotaging your finances so you don't get to that.

This is the moment to figure all those things out.

It starts with downloading the exercises and completing them.

If you get stuck with these exercises, send me a question for this week’s Q&A or ask the community on Facebook. If you have an a-ha moment, jump onto Facebook and share with everyone – chances are you’ll unblock something for someone else.

My Relationship with Money

Lesson 3

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My Financial Why

Good Bad and OK

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If you've read my book Budgets Don't Work (But This Does) you may remember the story of the modern-day piggy bank. It's one of my favourite money stories and so I'm going to retell it here.

When we think of saving money we often think of the Piggy Bank. This innocuous object has become synonymous with savings. Yet, if we think more deeply about it, why a pig? I mean, if I think about a pig I think dirty, muddy, fat, possibly greedy and of course, bacon. What has any of that got to do with saving money?

The truth is - absolutely nothing.

The name piggy bank originated from the word “pygg” (probably pronounced ‘pug’), which referred to an orange clay in ancient times used to form all sorts of pottery items including jars to hold loose change. Whenever people could save an extra coin, they dropped it into one of these clay jars. They called this their pygg bank. Over the next few hundred years, people forgot that “pygg” referred to the clay and not to the object itself. Fast forward to the nineteenth century when English potters received requests for piggy banks and they naturally produced items in the shape of a pig. This mistake appealed to customers, delighted children and the modern-day piggy bank was born. A mistake became embedded as one of our modern money stories. That a pig equals saving.

Other than being an interesting history lesson, what does the origins of the piggy bank have to do with your finances?

The answer is, everything.

That’s because there are so many money myths and money stories we’ve subscribed to when it comes to our finances that we accept as truths. Some of these money myths we now hold as deep-rooted truths - such as the myth that in order to become good at personal savings, you need to create and stick to a budget. (I’ll bust this myth in the Financial Knowledge module.)

Some money myths and money stories are cultural. These include: unless you have the right sort of education you won’t be a financial success. This might lead someone with an entrepreneurial bent, to study a course they’re not excited about in order to keep their parents happy.

Other money stories and myths are ones that have been unwittingly passed down by parents and peers.

Two of my favourite money stories or money myths are that women are spenders and men are savers. And that men are better investors than women. Well, not my favourites because they’re infuriating but they’re spoken as gospel by media and commentators. (We’ll bust these in the Investing modules.)

Before we head into the next Module where you’ll figure out what your Money Type is, it’s important to understand what role your Money Story plays and the money myths you’re carrying is playing in your life. To figure out if they are helpful messages or ones that simply aren’t financially serving you.

My Money Story

Lesson 4

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My Money Story